Tuesday, July 31, 2007

James Earl Jones

Most people don't know this, but the famous actor James Earl Jones actually tried to jump start a singing career when he was just 15 years old. Wanna hear it? Of course you do! Check it out here.


Enjoy,

Viper

The truth... finally.

a long time conspiracy, but this article seems to provide all the proof anyone should need.
The Death Star Attack: The Truth... Can You Handle It?
there should be no question in your mind after this article. the empire had to have been sabotaged.

Saturday, July 28, 2007

Jan Terri, why not?

So after some more checking I've found that this girl is legit. Yes, the real deal. I've found these videos are best watched under the influence of some good alcohol.

So here you go:

Baby Blues

Ever wonder what the western bar dating scene was like back in 1982? Well, take a look at this. And what the hell is the guy doing at 2:29?!

Little Brother Video

She decides to changes things up a bit and go for some culture, with this take on a famous French folk tune. I think all of France most be very proud.

Halloween Fun!

Just in time for your next Halloween party, check out this funk! Nice video effects! My favorite part is the back up dancers-singers.

One of the worst videos I've ever seen!!!

What do you get when you combine:

* a terrible, over weight singer, who can't lip sync

* crappy music with even worse lyrics

* video footage that looks like it was stolen from a promo 1983 video about Chicago

Music Video

Watch it and laugh, I know I did!

(By the way, I've never heard of this woman, and did find an article online about her, so I'm assuming this is real. If it isn't, who really cares, its still funny.)

Friday, July 27, 2007

The Truth About The Rock Industry

Yes, you read right...this is Illuminati news! Apparently there's a whole host of people who think that Rock & Roll is a secret weapon of mind control. But if you read between the lines there's some pretty funny, pathetic stuff in here:

And who am I? I am Wes Penre, a former rock musician and composer. I am one of those who did not fit into the Agenda of the Elite. I am one of those who at that time didn't understand why my revealing lyrics and melodic songs were not appreciated by the big Record Companies. Now I know better. And no matter what some people might think, I am NOT a bitter, failed musician, who wants to "get even" with the Industry. I live a life I am very happy with, and even if I had the chance again, I would not sign up to be a professional musician. In a better world I would, but I will NOT sacrifice my body and soul to make big bucks for the Illuminati.

Sure...THAT's why the Big Bad Record Companies didn't like your songs...Why else?

Dentist of the Week

Here. Implanted false tusks in an assistant's mouth during a routing procedure as a practical joke. They were removed before she woke up. I think I speak for all of us when I say "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"

SATAN !!!!

Yeah, yeah, we've got to expose satanism, kids... yeah, and, um... let's start HERE.

"I give you this tid-bit to ponder on. If your child did not like to take medicine and you had a chocolate drink with the medicine, plus arsenic in it, would you give it to them? You would if you did not know it was in there and what arsenic was."

W..T..F...?!?!?!

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Christians United For Israel

Holy Shit! This is an inside report on the Washington-Israel Summit. Right wing Christians supporting an expansion of Israel so Americans can "enjoy the second coming."

Tom Delay: "obviously it [the second coming] is what i live for. I hope it comes tomorrow."
Random Guy: "if you haven't seen the Left Behind series...well, it's scary"
Other Random Guy: "I can't wait for the rapture and the cleansing of the earth."

Let's Hope They Incorporate This Into SNICKERS Brand Candy

Allergy Free Peanuts

...for the sake of our very own Sad Panda.

Pope of the Week

Finally showing a little common sense.

Role Models of the Week

Astronauts flying drunk! Woo-Hoo!

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Texas. Why?

This tasty Texan was just appointed as the head of the TX state board of education. In addition to being a creationist ("Dr. McLeroy was one of four board members who voted against proposed high school biology textbooks because he felt their coverage of evolution was “too dogmatic” and did not include possible flaws in Charles Darwin’s theory of how life on Earth evolved from lower forms." according to Dallas Morning News) he also writes an...ummm...interesting...memo entitled "The Gift of Medieval Christendom To The Modern World" in which he asserts "Freedom is unique to the areas of the world that have been touched by Christianity."

Read his site. Your blood will boil.

Another great quote from the memo:

"
I argue that the development of medieval political structures with their limiting of the power of the governments and the resulting freedom for commerce, and the freeing or releasing of human energy coincides with the assimilation of the ideas of the dignity of the human being-"created in the image of God". This was a gift of the spread of Christianity in Europe or as many call it "Christendom".

Most world history books identify all the characteristics used in my argument but, in my opinion, fail to give them the significance they deserve. These books do not really give an explanation of the coincidence of Christianity and the freedom that follows it around."

Cheney Pic of The Day

Is that Cheney or Gob?

"You look like you're hunting dragons. In the Future."

I Wrote This Song in '94

From Dave Chappelle's lost episodes...a lost Tupac song....written "way before blackberry pagers."

DJ: Tupac, Rest in Peace
Tupac (on record): OK, I will!

UFOs!

It's true! I always knew it! Mass sightings in Stratford Upon Avon. And those pathetic excuses by the MOD:

"Unless there is evidence of a potential threat to the United Kingdom from an external military source, and to date no UFO report has revealed such evidence, we do not attempt to identify the precise nature of each sighting reported to us.

"We believe that rational explanations such as aircraft lights or natural phenomena could be found for them if resources were diverted for this purpose but its not the function of the MoD to provide this kind of aerial identification service."


Pathetic.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Best Colber Intro Ever

HP! HP! HP! HP! HP!

Dear Smokers (from Joe Jackson)

Here's an important message from our good friend Joe Jackson (whole post here)

======

Dear Smokers,

You are the scum of the earth. Bad enough that you are intent on committing suicide, but with your noxious fumes you are committing nothing less than murder too.

The preceding statement should sound pretty familiar by now. If you believe it, don't bother to read any further. But if you're skeptical, consider this: you're being made into scapegoats by people who are nowhere near as honest and noble as is commonly assumed. In fact a lot of them are downright nasty, and it's about time you started standing up to them.

From July 1st, smoking is banned in every pub, restaurant and club in England - including private clubs, but then again a pub is private property too. I could bemoan the loss of property rights; I could also have a good rant about the loss of tolerance and free choice. But the real issue is that the only possible justification for this ban is blatantly, and provably, so phoney that it stinks to high heaven. I refer, of course, to the grotesquely-hyped but elusive phantom of 'secondhand smoke'.

Bikini Clad Women Employed By Landscapers

Brilliant idea no. 2,341

How would you punish a disorderly student?

I can think of many creative ways...but I don't think it would ever occur to me to have them do: POND SQUATS.

Polar Bear Cub!

Everybody smile!

Fast Food Items of The Day

McDonald's NEW 42oz drink!
Hardee's Thickburger

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

The Philosophy of Alan Watts

... courtesy of Trey Parker and Matt Stone. Thoughtful clip.

Sunday, July 22, 2007

I believe another blogger said it best

a paragraph from kung fu monkey:

Oh, how they mocked. But my momentary cowardice still allowed me to retain a shred of dignity, and so was worth indulging. Because if I'd gotten on that ride, my friends would have actually heard me scream. Like a little girl. Like a little girl who just woke up because somebody licked her foot. Like a little girl who just woke up because somebody licked her foot, and then when she turns on the light there's an evil clown sitting in the middle of her bedroom, eating her pony.

There's no comebacks from the clown-pony scream.

News You Can Use

This is the headline, verbatim:
Tiny Brain No Problem for Tax Official
The utter truth in this article is unbearable.

Saturday, July 21, 2007

Grammar RULES!

from wall street journal online:

Knowing Their Place
The final Harry Potter book hits the shelves tonight, but USA Today reports that some spoilsports have gotten their hands on advance copies and are spreading the word:

"I am a bored, sadistic loser who doesn't play sports, have a job or have a girlfriend, so I posted Harry Potter spoilers," a 17-year-old Pittsburgh high schooler boasted in an interview with USA TODAY. "It was fun for myself at the expense of others." USA TODAY contacted the teenager after it saw his spoiler post on Facebook.

But not everyone is a bored, sadistic loser who doesn't play sports, have a job or have a girlfriend:

Major news outlets continued to avoid reporting spoilers available on the Web. "It's not exactly national security we're talking about," says NBC News vice president Phil Griffin, who oversees MSNBC. "I don't think it's our place to spoil the enjoyment."

What's troubling here, of course, is the implication that it is the place of journalists to undermine national security.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Oh dear, there goes all of my free time...

Check out this virtual NES. Pretty cool!

Office productivity down: 67%

Employee Morale up: 78%

:)

The Fattening Rooms of Africa

Absolutely fascinating. In some African cultures, having extra weight is a status symbol, and people pay to go to special "fattening rooms" where you can eat, sleep, and gain weight. It is particularly popular to do before weddings...

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Some Of The Coolest Structures In The Modern World

And they're Japanese!

And they're SEWERS!

Republican Gazette

This article is reporting on Hillary planning an event at a gay B&B, and then changing it to a traditional, non-gay B&B. All meant, I suppose, to simultaneously call Hillary's balls into question as well as further tagging Hillary as a gay supporter. So with all of this, I find it just a tad ironic that the Google sponsored ads pick up on "gay friendly B&B" and return ads just for that. So it seems, Republican Gazette might just might be more of a gay supporter than it knew!

The Perfect Chair For A Rainy Day

...or anytime for PotBott. The Biblio Chair!

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Cockerham

The town. Revel in the history.

"Cockerham is a small village and civil parish within the City of Lancaster district of Lancashire, England. It is six miles (9.6 km) south of Lancaster and fifteen miles (24 km) north-northwest of Preston. Located along the estuary of the River Lune, it has a total resident population of 558.[1]

Cockerham has lain within the historic county bounadaries of Lancashire since the middleages, having previously formed a township and parish within the hundred of Lonsdale and district of Lancaster.[2]"

Evangelical Preachers...

...with "100 Reasons Evolution is Stupid." What a dick!

Very Kevin Smith

Walmart to sell Jesus action figures! The "Buddy Christ" is next...

Monday, July 16, 2007

and while we're on condoms

why not bring the kids into this?

the girl that will wear this...

is screwed up in the head... or kinky to the max. either way, i definitely want to meet her.
The Best Bikini Ever Crafted By Human Hands.

When I Look For Condoms...

...I look for Japanese condoms. This article features 10 of the best, including Fe+Male condoms, and "Skins Mobile."

Best First Sentence Ever In A News Article

" BATH — Except for a tragic accident, the 35th annual Bath Heritage Days parade went off without a hitch."

Here.

2008 Election

There is really only one candidate worth voting for.

Friday, July 13, 2007

Patton Oswalt (old women giving birth and KFC)

Good bit from Conan

PSA

just so everyone in the world knows... they might be giants new album, "The Else," is now available on emusic.
hell yes.

Thursday, July 12, 2007

If you can't beat 'em...

... drop them. Nice, Sprint. Nice.

Holst + JASRAC =

Hilarity. This is the English version of a song protesting JASRAC.

Sierra Club

A very good article about WWII conservationism and a wartime change in lifestyle. I printed 50 color copies of it in size 26 font. I'm going to burn them on randomly selected desks today to show my support.

That reminds me, I left the a/c on 65 this morning. At least my room will be nice and cool when I get home to eat my nightly sirloin steaks (2)!!

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

It looks like WHAT??? No, no, no..

...you've got it all wrong! It's supposed to be a FLOWER!

Monday, July 09, 2007

The Role of Indie Retail in the Music Industry

Very good post by Glen Coolfer (which itself is a commentary on a Guardian article) regarding how indie retailers are not only weathering the changing music industry landscape, but actually thriving.

Sunday, July 08, 2007

more qvc magic

when a slightly charismatic salesman takes the super late night circuit selling absolute crap to anyone who happens to be watching at 3 in the morning, the results are whacky!
The Lava Lamp
The "Katsack"

Saturday, July 07, 2007

best youtube series ever!

so, it never occurred to me that on home shopping channels (ie. qvc and hsn), they sometimes sell things that can be dangerous... and therefore, the salesmen are likely to commit some folly which will end in their hilarious injury. that is, it never occurred to me... until now!
The Ladder
The Katana

Friday, July 06, 2007

salad days

according to wikipedia, salad days is the "longest running musical in british history..."

Jane (originally played by Eleanor Drew) and Timothy Dawes (originally played by John Warner), meet up in a park to plan their lives soon after their graduation. Deciding that Timothy must take the first job he's offered, a passing tramp offers them £7 a week to look after his mobile piano. Upon accepting, they discover that when the piano plays it delivers all within earshot an irresistible desire to dance! After attempts to ban the music by the Ministry of Pleasure and Pastimes, the piano vanishes, and Timothy enlists his Uncle Zed to take them in his flying saucer to retrieve it.

monty python made fun of it and sam peckinpah in one of my favorite skits.

Some Good Creationist Logic

Apparently the fact that a caterpillar turns into a butterfly is proof that God created all the animals without using any kind of evolutionary processes.

...and there were dinosaurs on the ark. And...apparently the poles were sub-tropical before the Flood.

20 Net Acronyms EVERY Parent Should Know

I don't even know where to start with this.

It all seems like a pretty tame tip for the 'rents until:

#12: IWSN (I Want Sex Now)

Woah there, kids. And how about:

#14: GYPO (Get Your Pants Off)

A little demanding, aren't we?

And I do love me some acronyms (LMSA), but now it's just getting gratuitous:

#20. NALOPKT (Not A Lot of People Know That)

TTYL Sublunar Minds.

flight of the conchords

if you haven't seen this show yet, what the hell is wrong with you?

Lesson: Cats Transport Cheaply

And you don't need to feed them for weeks at a time. I think that's pretty much the main point of this article.

Key quote: ""It's always a good day when the cat's alive," said Escamilla."