Sublunar Minds: June 2007

Friday, June 29, 2007

A secret laser suit hidden in Super Mario World. The word is that this is a rom hack, as it seems strange not to have come to light before 2007. BUT...it's still pretty cool. Dig that music!

This seems completely unreasonable...

Why would a Logan, UT, bus authority ban a 76 year old woman simply because she was harassing mothers of large, unruly, families to get on the pill? Seems like solid advice to me. We need more bold souls like her.

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Infamous Airline Complaint

Many of you may have already seen this by now. It's a jpg of an actual (or so they say) airline complaint letter.

yet ANOTHER golden snippet...

Construction worker on a smoke break to his buddy:

"She made my ex-wife look like Mary Poppins."

Now THAT's a spoonful of sugar.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

golden snippet

So as we were stumbling out of the Four-Faced Liar last night, I catch this golden snippet from a young man seated on the ground, talking on his cell phone:

"Whad'ya think, I turned Puerto Rican overnight?!?!"

Nice.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

the onion proves yet again...

how incredibly genius it can be!
the inanity of this opinion column is likened to that of an episode of seinfeld. so utterly satisfying.

Friday, June 22, 2007

Man gets sick benefits for heavy metal addiction

No kidding. Sweeden.

"Because heavy metal dominates so many aspects of his life, the Employment Service has agreed to pay part of Tullgren's salary. His new boss meanwhile has given him a special dispensation to play loud music at work."

Now MY soul mate has found me!!

What a coincidence!! Now, she didn't get my name right...but names don't really matter in true love. And she doesn't care about my bad eyesight! Where am I? Right here!!

Hi, Thorsten

Where are you, ready to understand the feelings, which overflow me, which are not afraid neither of strength of arms, nor of the bad eyesight? Where are you?

I am alive today, I am ready to feel, I am ready to sing of happiness. I am ready to cry to the skies about my happiness, about the ability, the wish to love and to be loved, I want to cry to the skies: Where are you, my love?!...

I can’t wait till the sky will give me my angel who will point me the heart which loves me more than anything else in this world! And will tell me where you are! I am here [URL] waiting only for You.

Kiss-kiss

Stell

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Best movie ever

Oh, it's coming. Cowboys vs Aliens

What is is about New Zeeland?

Key baby names, rejected by NZ government: "4Real," "Satan," "Adolf Hitler"

Naked people on roofs

This is actually pretty sad. I just like the quote "Clothing was discovered on the roof, leading authorities to suspect the man and woman, in their early 20s, may have been having sex."

What an astute observation...

The age old question

What would YOU do with seal penises?

good news, fellow Sublunarians...

I happened to stumble upon my soul mate while browsing junk email this morning. Needless to say, you'll all be invited to our inevitable wedding:

Subject: dear, good mood to u

Privet, my gentleman:

While you are thinking of me and about this letter I want you to ask
yourself: how often were you surprised to understand that you are so
willing to get a chance to meet me at least for a while? Maybe you are
trying to imagine our meeting in person, how wonderful we are spending the
time, how you just start to be happy because we are together?
And if you are indeed thinking of all this, wouldn’t it be logical to start
a communication and then meet in person in real life? To spend time
acquainting and realize that we are meant to be together?
Are you as brave as I am to write me your answer and to make the only step
to become happy?
You can send your best wishes to [undisclosed link, however I will tell you that the word "fantasy" was included in the URL]
and I will be happy to answer.

Waiting for your reply

St. Maris

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

LOTS of great nations still haven't adopted the metric system.

ZING!

Friday, June 15, 2007

Store of The Day

I hope this place is still in business when I have kids.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Headline of The Day

Who knew dead people could do so many things?

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

I want to party with this guy!

Two DUIs in the same day from the same cop! Note this quote:

After showing up drunk for his arraignment,"He was later released to a sober friend, but jumped from the friend's car and returned to downtown Missoula, where he continued drinking, court records said."

Crime in Louisanna

Is out of control.

telemarketers BEWARE

... Tom Mabe is fighting for the common man.

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

for all you Michael Cera / A.D. fans out there

The dude just might be a genius.

and speaking of food...

If you told me that the pic of the KFC Famous Bowl doesn't make you want to hurl, you are a LIAR.

a great sitcom

committed is this short-lived nbc sitcom, 13 episodes in all, and many were played twice in a week. very short series, but really really funny! i mean, a dying clown lives in the woman's closet because he was in the leasing agreement... come on! that's funny!

Monday, June 11, 2007

food bashing...

... can get downright vicious. A delicious excerpt: "If that appetizer knows what's good for it, it'll get on its knees and pray for mercy from sweet baby Jesus, because I went John Wayne Gacy on that shit."